I’m blessed to have parents who are enthusiastically supportive of my writing career. Of course, this means they want to know what I’m working on, what it’s about, when can they read it…
Now, usually I don’t want to share my writing because it hasn’t been edited and polished yet. In this case, however, I’m scared to tell them because I write fantasy. My parents are not fantasy fans; I wasn’t allowed to read even Narnia until almost middle school, and I remember my dad leaving off in the middle of reading me a story because he was afraid it might have magic in it. It was George Mcdonald’s The Golden Key.
Now that I’m older, I’m allowed more control over my reading, and fantasy is my favorite genre. My parents know this. I’m just not sure they know how much. So, I’m afraid if I share my writing with them, they’ll get upset. I try to be discerning and invite God into my writing process, but my stories do have magic in them. When I was younger, my mom criticized a story of mine because it had a dragon, and as she put it, dragon stories usually have magic. My magic systems are always either ‘other world science’, Holy-Spirit-sourced, or demonic-sourced (if evil, and those systems are clearly shown as evil). Still, in my book synopsis for example, I use the term ‘wizard’, and I know I’d have to explain that one.
Long question short, what do y’all think?
Thank you all for these answers, they’ve given me a lot to think about.
That’s tough, Sarah. Thanks for sharing your struggle.
“Honor your father and mother” is one of the big ten, and is also specifically affirmed by Jesus. So I think it’s important to take it really seriously.
That said, the way I would approach this is very different based on who I’m talking to. A child (under 18) who lives with their parents vs. a young adult (over 18) but who is still dependent and living with their parents vs. an independent adult who no longer lives with their parents will each need to apply different sensibilities to this question.
The commandment to “Honor your father and mother” doesn’t expire just because we turn 18 or move out, but the way we apply it will change just for practical reasons.
I believe that you’re in that middle category–over 18 and graduated from high school, but still living with your parents. So from here forward will reflect that. (For anyone reading who is in a different category, apply this advice with caution.)
I think it’s important to recognize that your parents love you and their heart is to protect you. Before you make any big decisions, ask yourself, is it possible that your parents know something about family history, about your personality, or about a particular danger/temptation/sensibility that’s unique to your family that may warrant extra caution?
As an example, is it possible that an ancestor (or even one of the parents) was heavily involved in witchcraft or the occult, and your parents’ extra caution may come from a better understanding of the danger to you and/or your family than you see?
As another example, is it possible that as keen observers and care takers of you since birth, that they’ve observed something in you that may make this area especially concerning?
Long story short, make sure you take the time to humbly ask lots of questions before you try to make a pitch. There could be a better reason than you know. “Mom and dad, I’m an adult now and I want to respect your wishes, but this thing confuses me. Will you help me to understand your perspective and why this is important to you? I want to see what you see.” Then really, really listen.
Even if there’s nothing, that gesture alone may demonstrate to them that you have the maturity to be trusted to make this decision for yourself moving forward. Any time there’s any type of conflict, beginning from a place of humility and genuinely wanting to hear and understand the other party is the best trailhead to get to a real solution.
But here’s a little wisdom: when someone has an unusually high aversion to something, it’s usually coming from somewhere. They didn’t just make it up because they wanted their kids to be weird. There’s something in the past that generated this sensitivity (and it may even be right!).
I’m not against Christian fantasy or the judicious use of magic in stories. But I am of the opinion that many Christian writers are far too cavalier with the way they employ magic, without taking the time to consider the implications of what they’re doing. We would all be right to be cautious and to make sure that we’re checking all of the boxes and doing it right. The danger of doing it wrong is real, both to the writer and to their future readers.
As a baseline, always be honest with your parents. After you move out, I think you deserve more discretion as to what you share and don’t share. But as long as you live under their roof and their authority, the Bible teaches us to submit, wholeheartedly.
My advice is don’t write things that you feel you need to hide. If you can’t have that conversation or if you feel that you can’t share your work, then pick a different idea. It’ll be OK. And it’ll be worth it to honor your parents and honor God by honoring your parents. That’s way more important than any particular project. It’s more important even than any particular career. (I recognize that’s tough to swallow and easier said than done, but it’s true.)
Until then, have the conversation. But start from a place of real humility. Ask lots of good questions, not to prove a point but really to learn. You may be surprised what you learn.
I LOVE writing fantasy!! (and reading it). I don’t have the same problem as you have, but I do have some cool ideas. If you read the Bible, you will find some absolutely CRAZY stuff that supports ‘magic’ on both sides, good and evil. For instance, in 1 Samuel 28, King Saul goes to a woman with a familiar spirit (KJV), she mentions wizards, and then brings Samuel up and Samuel says stuff. In my mind this aligns perfectly with the wizards and stuff from Lord of the Rings. The truth is, the world is scary, because evil is here almost like it is in fantasy books. BUT… so is good! You mentioned dragons, have you ever read Job 41? I love that chapter, the only thing that guy doesn’t have is wings, and just because they aren’t mentioned doesn’t necessarily mean he doesn’t have them 🙂
I am currently working on a sci fi fantasy novel, and there is teleportation in it, I guess you could say it’s more technological than magical, but here’s a verse about the good side of things: “And when they were come out of the water, the Spirit of the Lord caught away Philip, that the eunuch saw him no more: and he went on his way rejoicing. But Philip was found at Azotus: and passing through he preached in all the cities, till he came to Caesarea.” (Acts 8:39-40). If you ask me, that sounds like teleportation!
There are so many more instances in the Bible, OT and NT, where you can find supernatural things that unbelieving people often refer to as magic. The angels appearing on the side of the mountain in the OT (2 Kings 6), the talking donkey (Numbers 22:21-35), the floating axe head (2 Kings 6: 1-7), and even all the miracles that Jesus did, raising people from the dead, making blind people see. And then you read about the flying wheels that sound way too much like an alien spaceship (Ezekiel 1 15-21), and about time being rewound (2 Kings 20:8-11).
If I were you, I would write in a more “Christian” sense, using the word supernatural, and attributing the works in your book to either the evil side or the bad side (remember there’s no grey or lukewarm with God, there’s a stark line between good and evil and it’s good to stay on the good side), and then show you parents all the times in the Bible that the same things happened. Personally, I think that the Bible would make a great fantasy novel, full of war and supernatural miracles and signs. I agree with Brad, you should definitely honour you parents, but also show them what you think and what the Bible says. I think the world needs to know that there are two sides, we tend to think everything is good and all that, but really there is evil lurking in the shadows trying to snare us. We need to be aware of that, and if you portray it in a real way in your novel, I think that could help. That’s my mission, show good and evil, and show how God overpowers all and is the only way to salvation.
Happy writing, Sarah!!
Your sister in the faith, Colleen A.
I believe most writers who lean towards fantasy may have a prophetic gift. So it could be that the Holy Spirit is leading you to write fantasy novels to educate readers on the reality of the prophetic and spirit world – the good and bad side.
I am a prophetic seer and have been counseling others, which usually involves explaining what the Lord is revealing to them through dream or visionary symbols such as dragons, or other demonic creatures. If God uses these symbols to show us what’s happening spiritually (like Job 41), then it clearly has to be important.
I think if you can reference scripture when sharing your writing with them, and explain the reality of the spirit world and how your novels will be used as a pulpit to teach believers to overcome that darkness, it may put your parents at ease.
I’ve experienced some of this with my grandparents (although my parents are supportive of my writing fantasy) so here are a few things I’ve found helpful as a teen writer:
- You don’t need to share every story with every person. Some stories are meant for publication, and some are meant for yourself (like journaling). That being said, it sounds like your parents really love you and want to be involved in your writing–so I would definitely encourage you to find something you want to share with your parents, maybe even writing a short story for a gift for them.
- Would it help to share with them the history of the fantasy genre? I think most Christians today don’t realize it was started by three Christian men: MacDonald, Lewis, and Tolkien.
- If your parents are still hesitant/concerned about your writing fantasy, then maybe consider writing magicless fantasy for right now. Again, my grandmother is anti magic in fiction, but she has no problem with fantasy that doesn’t include magic (so a fictional world and fantasy vibes, but no actual spells/wizards/etc), and has enthusiastically read both my magicless fantasy novels.
I’d recommend having a conversation about fantasy and why you’ve chosen to write in that genre before giving them any stories with fantasy elements. But in the meantime, maybe you could write a short story in a different genre with them, to still involve them in your writing. 🙂 Hope this helps!
Two things I neglected to include in my original answer:
1. As a teenager myself, I think it’s easy to be nervous about a parent’s reaction to something and make a bigger deal out of it than it actually is. I have to keep reminding myself my parents were once teenagers too, and there’s not much about the teen years that’s a huge shock to them! I’ve procrastinated talking to them about various things, expecting they would be upset, and then they weren’t in the least. Your parents sound like loving and reasonable people, so I expect you’ll have a similar experience.
2. I second what Brad said–he put it much better than I could have! Writing/loving fantasy is not inherently a bad thing. But God will bless you through obedience to your parents–the 10 Commandments say that very clearly. It sounds like this is an area they’re giving you a lot of freedom in, which is a blessing. But if they do have concerns (and even if their concerns are completely unreasonable, which seems unlikely), God will still bless you through obedience to them.
When Paul traveled, he used the lingo of the local people he visited. It’s why he said he’s a Roman to the Romans, a Greek to the Greeks, and a Jew to the Jews.
When we write fantasy, we are reaching out to people who love fantasy, who other Christians don’t know how to talk to in a way that resonates with them.
I thought…Surely it is no accident that God gave you to be the daughter of parents who are sensitive about this subject. I think you need to explain them well – if you introduce magic to represent the antagonists it’s normal, but if it’s about the good guys, then they use powers given to them by God, or they perform miracles, not magic. I think this would be good for everyone, and it is in accordance with our beliefs.